


I'm Sorry and I Love You

by ceenderella



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-18
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-09-21 16:47:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17046923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ceenderella/pseuds/ceenderella
Summary: Mingyu is being distant, and Wonwoo just had have enough of it. Will Mingyu confess and clear up the understanding before it's too late?





	I'm Sorry and I Love You

They just finished filming their Part Switch video for Mansae and Wonwoo can’t wait to finally go back to their dorm and wallow in misery. He knew it was no use, whatever misunderstanding he had with his boyfriend only worsen with today’s shoot. The others seemed to noticed his preoccupation and was really worried, especially their leader, but he pushed them away saying he just had a slight headache and proceeded to put on his headphones without turning any music just to avoid talking with his members.

 

As soon as they arrived at their dorm he went to their room, got some clothes and showered, hoping to relieved some of the stress he felt with a hot shower. After that he went promptly to sleep. Just as he was heavy in sleep, he was woken up by their maknae.

 

“Hyung, come on, eat some first. You didn’t eat lunch earlier and at the rate you’re going you’ll end up being sick,” Chan said.

 

“Channie, I’m not hungry. You guys go on and eat, I’ll just sleep since I’m dead tired,” the elder said, then turned his back on the younger. He pretended to sleep, making his breath even, and heaved a relieved sigh when finally, the younger went out of the room. He thought back to the day’s event and can’t help but feel lonelier. Today’s shoot really taxed him. It was so hard to pretend that everything’s alright, that he was fine with the concept today, but every time he saw his boyfriend with their other members, no matter how much he knows he should trust him, he just can’t. His trust was broken and it’s so hard to forgive his boyfriend.

 

As he pondered, he was not aware that time has escaped him. He didn’t notice that he was not the only one in the room anymore, his boyfriend, Mingyu, and their other roommate, Hansol was in the room with him.

 

“Hyung, get up, eat something. You’re as thin as a stick right now,” Hansol said and pushed on his shoulders. Wonwoo pretended to just woke up and stretched his arms.

 

“Hansol-ah, hyung is tired. Just shower and go to sleep. I’m not hungry,” Wonwoo said and proceeded to turn his back again to the two. He sighed, relieved when he heard the door opened and closed again.

 

“I know you’re awake, can’t we talk?”

 

Wonwoo was startled when he heard someone talk. Recognizing the voice, he froze a bit before answering. “Now, you want to talk? Is there something we still need to talk about?”

 

“Of course there is! For one, you’re starving yourself! How are you supposed to finish our promotions if you’re sick?” The younger said.

 

“That is none of your business. Just go back to your lover’s arms and stay there.” The older said with a huff. It still hurts him to be reminded of what happened last week, when he saw his boyfriend, if he could still call him that, hugging and kissing another guy at the mall when he was about to surprised him for their 1000 days.

 

Wonwoo waited for the door to open and closed in a bang but nothing happened. He peeked from his blanket and saw Mingyu taking off his sweatshirt. “Yah! What are you doing?” Wonwoo said in a tired voice. The younger ignored and him and proceeded with taking off the rest of his clothes besides his boxer shorts.  He then went to the elder’s bed. “Yah, answer me Kim Mingyu! What are you doing?” Wonwoo screamed while struggling to keep the blankets on him. Mingyu is currently winning the struggle within the two, then successfully held the older down and pinned him to the bed. After much struggling, Wonwoo finally relented and let the younger spooned him from behind.

 

“Why are you struggling when you’re the one who said that I should go to my lover?” Mingyu murmured sleepily in Wonwoo’s ears.

 

“When did I said that, stupid?”

 

“You said earlier that I should go to my lover’s arms. Now that I’m finally here, you keep pushing me away,” the younger said with sadness in his voice.

 

“Am I still your lover, Mingyu? After what you did last week, kissing and hugging Doyoon hyung, then ignoring me until now? And of course all the time you’ve changed the choreography for earlier? You didn’t think Soonyoung won’t tell me all your odd requests?” Wonwoo said with tears in his eyes. He tried to hold it in, but once a tear fell, he can’t stop it.

 

“You know I love you, Wonwoo, I really do. What happened with Doyoon-hyung is a misunderstanding. He confessed to me, and I rejected him…”

 

“You rejected Doyoon hyung? That’s a hard story to sell, Mingyu. That was not a rejection I saw.”

 

“What you saw was Doyoon-hyung forcibly kissing me while I try to escape. Believe me Wonwoo, I love you and I never wanted to hurt you.”

 

“Whatever happened last week, it still won’t erase how you ignored me since then, and the choreo changes.”

 

“Won, I can’t change it anymore. What’s done is done, all I can do is explain. Will you listen to me explain with an open mind? Please, because if you won’t whatever I say won’t have any effect on you otherwise, I’m just wasting my breath.”

 

Wonwoo sighed, he can see the point in what the younger was saying, but thinking about all the things that happened that week, his heart still hurts. His mind is ready to listen, but his heart is still mending. Finally, he said: “I’ll listen to you, but not now Mingyu, especially not when we are in bed. Maybe tomorrow when the hurt is not so fresh?”

 

Wonwoo heard the younger froze for a bit, but he didn’t care. He let the steady rhythm of the younger’s heartbeat lull him to sleep.

 

*********************************************************************

 

 

The next day Wonwoo woke up earlier than his bedmate, seeing the time, it was only 6am, roughly 3 hours had passed since his talk with his boyfriend. Since he knew that he wouldn’t be able to sleep anymore once he woke up, he started getting ready for the day. With a wistful look directed at the person still asleep in his bed, he left the room.

 

He went to the kitchen to cook some food, but what surprised him is that a box of leftover pizza had his name on it-literally. He took a closer look at it and saw his members note, saying:

 

_Wonwoo, don’t starve yourself. Whatever the problem is, you could talk to us, especially the hyungs. And your dongsaengs are there for you to ~~bent out your anger~~ listen to your problems too. Don’t stress too much, your eyebags are getting heavier, the stylist noona is having a hard time for your make-up lately, hehehehe. Eat the whole pizza, Wonwoo. And no matter what anyone would say later, don’t you dare give them any slice!_

_-Seungcheol, Jeonghan, Jisoo, Junhui, Soonyoung, Jihoon, Seokmin, Minghao, Seunkwan, Hansol, Chan_

 

Wonwoo was touched by his members’ thoughts that he can’t help the tears that were falling in his eyes. He put the pizza in their oven to heat it, not only for him, but for all his members. No matter what they say, they would still get a slice of this pizza, he can’t finish it all, especially since he doesn’t have that much of an appetite.

 

He just finished eating a slice, when his best friend, Soonyoung, saw him.

 

“Wonwoo! You’re eating!” His best friend exclaimed.

 

Wonwoo laughed at his best friend’s exuberance. “Yes I’m eating, Soonyoung. Do you want a slice?”

 

Soonyoung was about to get a slice when their leader’s voice broke through, “Have you already forgotten what we’ve talked about last night, Soonyoung?”

 

“But hyung-“

 

“No buts! Extra practice for you if you get a slice!”

 

“Hyung, it’s okay. I can’t eat it all, anyway. Do you want me to waste all our money?” Wonwoo asked the leader with pleading eyes.

 

The leader thought for a bit, but then their members came down one by one.

 

“Hyung!” their maknae screamed upon seeing Wonwoo. The older just laughed at the youngest reaction to seeing him eating and patted his head.

 

“Wonwoo-hyung, are you alright?” Minghao asked, the Chinese asked him.

 

“Don’t worry Myungho. Hyung is okay, do you want some pizza?” Wonwoo offered him.

 

“Yes!” the maknae line screamed, while they were all trying to grab some piece. Upon seeing this, most of the hyung line grabbed at least one of the maknae line to stop them from getting a piece.

 

“Remember what we said last night? No getting the pizza that we saved for Wonwoo,” Jeonghan said in a mild but reprimanding tone to the Maknae line.

 

“But hyung-“ the maknae line whined together with Wonwoo.

 

“Jeonghan, maybe you could make an exception? Look at Wonwoo,” Jisoo said while pointing at the adorable pouting Wonwoo.

 

Jeonghan looked at Wonwoo, then the rest of the maknae line and Soonyoung who joined Wonwoo in pouting. He just sighed, knowing he was defeated. “Fine but-“ Before he could finish the rest of the members yelled “YES!” and dug through the pizza box. Wonwoo looked at his members with a smile then turned around to prepare for the day.

 

*****************************************************************

 

After their appearance at the music show, they directly went back to their dorms. Wonwoo immediately went to their room to get some clothes to change into after showering. It was already a week after Wonwoo and Mingyu’s talk, but nothing seemed to have changed-Mingyu still chased after Wonwoo, hoping to at least clear up any misunderstanding that still remained after their talk, and to finally have some peace in their relationship; and Wonwoo still tries to avoid having the talk, afraid that it will to their eventual break-up.

 

“Hyung, why won’t you try to talk to Wonwoo-hyung once more?” their maknae asked Mingyu.

 

“Yah-you’re too young to be giving out advices, Channie. Let them deal with their problems,” Their leader, Seungcheol said.

 

“I agree with Chan, their problem is already putting a strain in our teamwork. Did you see how out of it Wonwoo is?” Wonwoo’s bestfriend, Soonyoung, said.

 

“I know, but it’s not easy. Have you seen how Wonwoo tries to avoid doing anything that has to do with me? Heck, he didn’t even eat the cheeseburger that I bought for him simply because I was the one who bought it. Wonwoo rejected a cheeseburger!” Mingyu said, his carefully placed façade breaking. It was a well-known fact among them that Wonwoo would never share with them his burgers as much as possible, and to think that he rejected one is a big deal.

 

“Why don’t you ambush in the shower?” Jun said.

 

Most of the members looked in disbelief at what the quiet boy suggested. Jisoo even gasped at the statement and was about to protest when Mingyu exclaimed, “You’re right! I should have done that! Thank you Jun hung!”

 

And with that they stared at the back of their tallest member who was trying to hurry because it was only a matter of time before his boyfriend finishes up his shower.

 

At the bathroom, Wonwoo was toweling his wet body when the door suddenly opened revealing Mingyu, who was trying to catch his breath.

 

“Yah! What are you doing? I thought I locked the door? And why are you panting as if you ran a marath-“ Wonwoo was not able to finish what he was saying because his lips were suddenly attacked by his boyfriend’s lips. 

 

Wonwoo tried to struggle, but his attempt was thwarted by Mingyu at every turn. “Stop struggling for a moment Wonwoo. I missed you too much right now. Please let me have this moment for now, and then let’s talk after.” Mingyu murmured at his lover’s lips then proceeded to kiss him again. He poured out all of his emotions into the kiss, all the hurt that he’d experience with Wonwoo’s aloofness, his disappointment that every time that he tried to talk to the older resulting in the older avoiding him, and finally, his love for the older-that no matter how much Wonwoo tried to drive him crazy, there’s one thing that won’t change, and that is how much he loves him.

 

Wonwoo finally stopped trying to escape Mingyu’s arms and enjoyed the kisses that his boyfriend is giving him. No matter how much he tried to rationalize his anger, at this moment it’s not important. What’s important is trying to reaffirm that his boyfriend’s love is still there, and his for him.

 

They lost all sense of time until a very loud “Ahem” was heard. Wonwoo suddenly push Mingyu away when he heard it. He looked at the source of the noise and saw their leader, Seungcheol looking at them with a smirk on his face, while trying to shield them from their other members’ eyes.

 

“As much as I’m happy to see that both of you had made up, I’m still not happy that you chose to make the bathroom your love nest-especially you Wonwoo, you’re the older one between you two, you should have known better.  With that being said, I’d like both of you to vacate the bathroom in a few moments. I’ll give you two some privacy now,” Seungcheol said while closing the door. The pair looked so embarrassed that the leader can’t help but let out a low chuckle. Just when they thought it was all over, the door was opened again by the leader, “Wonwoo-ah, I hope that when you do go out, you’ll have the decency to put on some clothes, are we clear?” With that he finally left them alone.

 

 

Wonwoo finally realized that the towel that was secured tightly on his waist earlier was in his boyfriend’s hands now, leaving him with not a stitch of cloth to cover up his modesty. While he was so flustered and just stared at the towel, his boyfriend was trying to hide the smile that was threatening come out. To distract him, Mingyu put his arms around his boyfriend’s waist to wrap the towel, and Wonwoo was blushing the entire time.

 

“I’ll leave you to get dressed and we’ll talk in our room, okay? I’ll tell Hansol to just play at Channie’s room so we could talk in peace,” Mingyu told him while securing the towel. With a final look, he went outside.

 

Wonwoo was still dumbstruck but was able to dress himself silently and went outside to see some of his members smirking his way. He blushed harder, if that was possible, and quickly went to his room to find his boyfriend holding a box.

 

“Do you remember this”

 

“Of course, that’s what you gave me for our 100 days. You said that you gave that to me so that I’ll always remember the start of our relationship when things are hard, when I can’t seem to hold on, and whenever you do something stupid-which you said you’ll eventually do causing me to second-guess if it’s still worth it to stay with you, you said I just need to look at this box and I’ll remember,” Wonwoo said.

 

“And did you look at the box?” Mingyu asked, his breath hitches a bit.

 

“Every single day since I found you and Doyoon-hyung,” Wonwoo whispered.

 

“And nothing’s changed? You still won’t believe me that all I want is you?” Mingyu’s voice breaks as he said the last word.

 

“I want to- God knows I’ve been wanting to believe in your promises, in what I’ve seen in the box, but I can’t. Not when every day that I’m wishing you’ll come and explain to me whatever’s on your mind, I see you with Jeonghan hyung. Or whenever I thought you’ll finally come to me to explain all the weird things that’s been happening, I see you talking to Soonyoung, trying to change the choreography from the original so that we won’t have to interact. I just can’t do this anymore, Mingyu. It’s either you explain it to me now, or be ready to say goodbye,” Wonwoo said, tears glistening in his eyes.

 

“I told you a week ago that I want to explain but you won’t hear it!” Mingyu yelled, his frustration clearly heard in his voice.

 

“Would you listen if you were me? When you just cleared the air about Doyoon hyung’s kiss? When for the first time in days we’re in each other’s arms? Would you?”

 

“I… I don’t…” Mingyu stuttered.

 

“Exactly! If you were the one in our situation, you would probably have broken up with me already. So please understand, I was hurt; I’m still hurt, but I’m trying to get over it.” Wonwoo stated with a heavy heart. “But I’m ready to hear your reason now, Mingyu,” Wonwoo said while caressing the younger’s face, “whenever you’re ready to tell me again, I would listen.”

 

“Wonwoo,” the younger started, as if debating with himself again if he should talk or not, but then the former won and he decided to talk. “You know how just the day before the shoot of our part switched video I was late to come to rehearsals because I had a phone call from home? After the phone call, I accidentally overheard our president and vice president talking. They were saying how happy we’ve been the past few months, and our whispering that always happens during rehearsals and shows when we thought that no one was looking at us. They thought that we’re dating and that we’re conspiring with each other so that they won’t find out.”

 

Mingyu took a deep breath before continuing. “They were right in that sense, we are dating, but not with other people as they incorrectly thought. I was about to make myself known to explain to them that we are not dating other people, but the president suddenly said that if we still appear to be too close, they’ll be forced to split us, with you joining the performance unit and Chan replacing you in the hip hop unit after our promotion for Mansae. I don’t want that to happen because the only time we can get together aside from rehearsals is when we have to write lyrics for our mix tapes and songs, and if you join the performance group, we would have no more time for each other. So I decided on my own that I have to distance myself from you, even for a while so that they won’t be able to split us apart. Wonwoo,” Mingyu started then looked at the glimmering eyes of his boyfriend, his own bright eyes staring at him, “it hurt me a lot coming to that decision, having to do it too without arousing suspicion from the management that I overheard their conversation is hard too. Please tell me that you understand me, please.” Mingyu begged the older.

 

Wonwoo was stunned. From all the scenarios that was playing in his head, he did not expect that the reason Mingyu was so distant was because of that. His heart bled for the younger’s pain, but he is still angry that he did those things without consulting him first.

 

“I understand-“ Wonwoo started and Mingyu was about to hug him, when the older put up his hand to stop him. “I understand your motives, Gyu, but what I don’t understand is why you didn’t talk to me? If you had, I would have gone along with your plans. I would have understood it, and we’ll play the part. It would also lessen the heartache that we’ve felt, that I felt most especially, since I really thought that you were getting tired of me.”

 

“You know how crappy an actor you are Wonwoo. If I told you, you won’t be able to help yourself and act so weird. You have to have no idea so our management would believe it,” Mingyu stated.

 

“Well, your plan worked. I believed you so much, the management would have to, too. And do you know what else, Mingyu? I think we need some space,” the older stated with a firm voice.

 

“What? Why? I explain everything to you. Why do we need to have space?” The younger demanded with a hurt voice.

 

“Because this situation proved to me how little trust we have in each other. That we love the other so much we forgot ourselves in return. We need some space to sort out the things that are bothering us, alone, so that when the time comes for us to decide if we want to continue our relationship, we are whole-not like this, when the littlest things spark our mistrust with each other,” the older stated with a heavy heart. He saw how the younger’s face is filled with anguish, and his normally happy face is nowhere to be seen. His heart yearns for his boyfriend, to put his arms around him, to comfort him that everything will be okay, but he can’t. He had to be firm with his resolution because he truly believes in it. He is tired, just tired from the physical exhaustion that they are submitted to, and the emotional drama that he had faced this past few weeks.

 

“Are you sure Wonwoo? Maybe we’ll talk again in the morning? Please, just don’t say that you’re breaking up with me.”

 

“I am not breaking up with you, silly” The older tried to joke while stroking the younger’s face. “We just need some time for ourselves, for us to mature a little more. I’m still here, I’m still your best friend, I just won’t be your boyfriend for a while. But we love each other right?” he saw the younger nod then continued. ”Then we’ll find our way back to each other. It’s not like I’m leaving or you're leaving, we’ll still by each other’s side. I’m still here if you want to talk, I’ll always listen to you whine about not having enough food to eat. But we’ll just have some space. Like we’re back to zero with each other. We’ll just start by becoming whole again, okay?” Wonwoo said.

 

He could still see the sadness and hurt in the younger’s eyes although he nodded his head in consent. His heart is breaking but he appeared strong in the outside. He stood up from the bed that they were sitting and kissed his boyfriend lovingly, while his hands are stroking his face, trying to memorize every contour of the younger's face, as it would be a long time before they could do this again.

 

He finally stopped the kiss in what felt like a lifetime, and laid his forehead on Mingyu’s forehead. “Remember Mingyu, I love you so much. But you and I, we need to find maturity first and be whole before we can be together again. I’m sorry, and I love you,” Wonwoo said then finally, with a last heartfelt glance, he walked out of the room.

**Author's Note:**

> An old work I have on aff, so if it seems familiar, that's because this was written and posted there 2-3 years ago. Comments and kudos are highly appreciated.


End file.
